Other suggestions:

• Be a good listener.
• Assist the survivor in getting the help s/he needs and wants. This may mean providing phone numbers, information, an escort, etc.
• Remember that it is important for a survivor to make her/his own decisions as a step in regaining control and overcoming feelings of helplessness.
• If s/he feels guilty for not 'fighting back' tell the survivor that fear often inhibits people and that cooperation does not mean consent.
• Assure the survivor that it was not his/her fault. No one asks or deserves to be raped.
• Try to minimize the number of times the survivor must involuntarily tell the story of assault.
• Express support. Be aware that physical closeness, touching, or hugging may or may not be comfortable for the survivor - ask first.

Things to avoid:

• Giving advice or making decisions for the survivor.
• Telling the survivor what you would have done.
• Asking the survivor why s/he did not scream, fight, or run.
• Asking the survivor if s/he did anything to 'lead' the rapist on.
• Preventing the survivor from talking about the assault if s/he wants to."
  

RAPE - THE FACTS