Fill in the _______. Fill in the _______.

Love is in the air (or maybe not)

Where to begin?…

Aside from schoolwork, work and a few other things, relationships can be a huge part of your college experience. 

If a relationship becomes a part of your college experience, it’s important to make sure that it’s a healthy relationship.

So what’s a healthy relationship?…

While I’m by no means an expert (or even close) on relationships, I know that it’s important to maintain a healthy relationship, should you find yourself in one.

1. Make sure the relationship doesn’t consume you

This is especially important early on in the relationship. I get that it’s new and exciting, but you have to remember that you are still here for school, so don’t let your relationship hinder your abilities in class/schoolwork. Don’t forget about your friends either! Make time for everyone and everything that you need to!

2. Make sure you are being treated how you want to be treated

Most importantly, make sure you are being treated with respect. Be able to recognize what you want in your relationship and how you want to be treated. And if you aren’t being treated that way, get out of it. Especially, if the relationship becomes abusive or dangerous in any way. Know that if you find yourself in that situation, there are resources on campus to help you.

3. Know your boundaries and your partners boundaries, and respect them

Have a conversation with your partner about what your boundaries are, ask them theirs and then stick to them. If everything is laid out on the table, then you know where you stand with each other in regards to being able to respect each other’s boundaries.

4. Support each other

While keeping the ideas from #1 in mind, it’s also important to support your partner and to receive support from them. While this doesn’t mean you have to be their “cheerleader” for every single thing, you should be there for them when they need you, as they should for you.

But what if I’m dealing with a break up?…

Unfortunately, relationships don’t always work out and sometimes break ups happen. The biggest piece of advice I have for you, if you’re experiencing a break up, is that life goes on. Break ups can be really hard on people. And if you  find a break up being rather difficult for you, know that you aren’t alone. 

Surround yourself with your friends and family. If you’d rather talk to someone else, try out the counselors on campus, they can be a great ear to talk to and get advice/insight from.

Try not to let the break up affect your school/work performance. I know that this can be really difficult, but trying to dig yourself out of a hole in school work on top of dealing with the break up, doesn’t make things better. Do your best to keep on top of things.

Again, know that life goes on and who knows what the future has in store for you. Keep your head up. Things will get better!

And what if I don’t want a relationship?…

That’s totally fine! Don’t consider yourself the “odd one out” by any means! Relationships aren’t for everyone at this point in life and that’s okay. Everyone in college is at different points in life, may be experiencing things differently, etc. and that means some people may not be ready for a relationship, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

If you have any questions you’d like me to answer on relationships or any other topics, click here to ask anonymously.